I was venting to my Mum yesterday about all my stress as I had a deadline to meet and other things were going on that just swamped me in negative thoughts.
She told me that I wear my heart on my sleeve, that I always see the best in people and give them multiple chances after they've done wrong. I guess she's right. I don't cope well with being mistreated emotionally. That's just me. Some people are able to just take it on the chin and remove whatever hurt them from their lives, but I struggle to do that.
I've been mislead, lied to and taken for granted several times and it's honestly one of the worst feelings I have ever felt. Yet I am so willing to allow whoever made me feel that way to have another chance and another chance and another chance. I know it makes me an idiot and that perhaps it puts me in a postion where I ask for it because when someone else makes me feel that way, surely it was my own fault for giving them the chance to treat me like that. Maybe I'm just too nice. Why should being too nice be a bad thing? I suppose it's because people use that against me. They think that regardless of how they treat me, they know they'll get another chance. Honestly, I think that my reason for being mistreated is because I'm too trusting, I don't have enough confidence and I guess I lack a bit of self-respect. I look back on situations after they've occurred and think why didn't I say that? Why did I not have enough common sense to think no, you don't need to put yourself in a position to get hurt again?
Unfortunately, in life a massive red "don't go there" sign doesn't appear above people's heads when you feel as though you want to be friends with someone or get in to a relationship with them. However, sometimes you might think you know that person. They might get you on their side and encourage your feelings for them to change and then no longer care. I guess that shows their true colours. I like to think that I'm not easy to manipulate and for most things that is true. I'm sensible and will always stand my ground if I need to, but emotionally I suppose I am easy to manipulate and that's really not a good position to be in.
Dotty
X
She told me that I wear my heart on my sleeve, that I always see the best in people and give them multiple chances after they've done wrong. I guess she's right. I don't cope well with being mistreated emotionally. That's just me. Some people are able to just take it on the chin and remove whatever hurt them from their lives, but I struggle to do that.
I've been mislead, lied to and taken for granted several times and it's honestly one of the worst feelings I have ever felt. Yet I am so willing to allow whoever made me feel that way to have another chance and another chance and another chance. I know it makes me an idiot and that perhaps it puts me in a postion where I ask for it because when someone else makes me feel that way, surely it was my own fault for giving them the chance to treat me like that. Maybe I'm just too nice. Why should being too nice be a bad thing? I suppose it's because people use that against me. They think that regardless of how they treat me, they know they'll get another chance. Honestly, I think that my reason for being mistreated is because I'm too trusting, I don't have enough confidence and I guess I lack a bit of self-respect. I look back on situations after they've occurred and think why didn't I say that? Why did I not have enough common sense to think no, you don't need to put yourself in a position to get hurt again?
Unfortunately, in life a massive red "don't go there" sign doesn't appear above people's heads when you feel as though you want to be friends with someone or get in to a relationship with them. However, sometimes you might think you know that person. They might get you on their side and encourage your feelings for them to change and then no longer care. I guess that shows their true colours. I like to think that I'm not easy to manipulate and for most things that is true. I'm sensible and will always stand my ground if I need to, but emotionally I suppose I am easy to manipulate and that's really not a good position to be in.
Dotty
X
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